Four of us were living in a one bedroom apartment. Shoreline Apartments, which used to be located off East Riverside just past I-35, was mostly full of poor Mexican families who probably had less money and were packed in even tighter than us. The complex was a pile of crap. Every night, crackheads and other [...]

For the last seven years, in the beginning of June, Austin has been crowded with homeless looking crusty punks. This year, there will more of them than ever  before. They’ll be streaming into town for Austin’s most die-hard music fest: Chaos in Tejas. This year there’s an impressive lineup with Best Coast (an unlikely pick) [...]

“You’d better not write any of my shit down,” the man said, his voice passing through wet gravel vocal chords into words that emanated from a stinking cave of a mouth. “I’m a very literary man,” he said. His missing lower incisors and crooked premolars were jagged, yellow stalagmites rooted tentatively beneath the considerable degradation [...]

Some of my favorite X-Files episodes are those in which Mulder and Scully let loose and have a drink (or in Scully’s case, a cigarette). Mulder is not only a prodigy when it comes to writing profiles on serial killers nor is he only crafty when uncovering the conspiracies surrounding EBEs (extraterrestrial biological entities). When [...]

One of my first jobs was at Baskin Robbins. It was basically every high school kid’s dream job. I made enough money to move out my senior year, had enough down time to get most of my homework done, gave away loads of free ice cream to all of my friends, and learned a thing [...]

Served TIP-POOLS. ARE THEY EVER A GOOD IDEA? by Marie Scott Drink of the month THE MULDER-ITA by Lisa van Dam-Bates Racing towards A Crash HOW AUSTIN’S ACCELERATED ATTEMPTS AT BECOMING THE NEXT NEW YORK COULD END IN DISASTER by Brandon Roberts Behind the Mayhem A CONVERSATION WITH TIMMY HEFNER ON CHAOS IN TEJAS by [...]

Getting busted with drugs is easy—just jump in a car with ‘em. But that doesn’t stop any of my friends from carrying their drugs everywhere they go. I have one friend who keeps this little Pokémon ball ashtray in his car full of weed. It sits right next to the regular ashtray. If I were [...]

The Grand Surviving a week of work/rock ‘n’ roll related exhaustion, I sat down with only a few hours left on my deadline, a personal recorder with always hard to hear audio, and a pocket notebook with notes of slightly better legibility scratched next to vegetarian food orders, which generally occupy the pages of said [...]

At the moment of this writing the knuckles of my right hand are swollen because last night I got impressively drunk and made an ass out of myself in front of a very beautiful young woman whom I was attempting to court. The realization of this fucking-up was not something Drunk Anderson was particularly well-prepared [...]

About a year ago I went out to breakfast with some friends. We were hung over and starving. It was a weekday, and definitely past noon, but we found a Mexican restaurant that was still serving breakfasty things. There were six of us and we all paid separately. I rarely look at the itemized receipt, [...]